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Main - The Officer's Club - Regarding the situation
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Jamie
Posted on 05-11-18 10:58 AM Link | ID: 132154


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Since: 06-03-14
From: East Kent, UK

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I'm probably going to come back in about a month, properly, with a phone. Unfortunately, I don't know if I want to be hanging around these communities anymore - I'll probably give all but Kafuka a miss, because all of the others I've been banned from for my absolutely pathetic actions which I regret strongly even happened.

Things like my community are completely dead and won't ever be coming back. I should have let that thing die over a year ago and none of this would even have happened in the first place, to be honest, it's that and my idiocy that has caused problems for me so much, that I treated it too seriously for what it was: a derpboard/derpcord that compiled mostly unintelligent people in what was a potentially good place, but ruined by my constant repetitive actions. I'm not going to bother again, I've pretty much learnt I can't run anything without ruining it early on in its run every time. (Unless of course there is actually a purpose to its future existence, which there probably won't be unless I try to come up with a dumb reason for it)

Discord is also a no-go since I've caused problems and others have caused me problems there, more the former though.

If I do consider coming back to Kafuka, it will probably be under a different name, more than likely my real name (Jamie, if you're wondering). I'm definitely not going to MTF because I only jumped on that bandwagon to look cool, like a certain somebody, to be straight with you people. I'm done with hiding behind a million names and stuff, I just need to be me, and that's that. ME is a better person than these fake identities try to be, since a few months.

I likely won't respond to this thread under this name, but I will definitely take posts into consideration for the future, and will be reading as a guest every now and again.

Thanks ^^

Thieppy
Posted on 05-11-18 03:31 PM Link | ID: 132155


gee, waffles!
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From:

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it's no use mourning over the past. honestly, you don't need to. you have a harsh opinion of yourself, I can see that. but we don't. not nearly as much.
personally, I'm used to seeing you come and go, and pull unusual stuff over time. I don't mind it, so long as it's in your favor; aka not outright detrimental to you.

your "pathetic" actions as you call them, were generally between your group of people you put together yourself. you can quit that group anytime, and your rep is pretty much clean. you needn't run away from places. for boards, moderators only care if you actually cause trouble; otherwise, an old reputation won't restrict you too much if you act normally.

granted, your own group was a failure- but not simply because of you as who you are.
it all happened because of the endless reboots among your boards, and eventually your skype/discord groups. over time it's done something you'd expect, and that is filtering people.
most of the sticky peeps who came back over and over and put up with it all turn out to be toxic. there's a few exceptions, but the group of peeps among your community is not one you'd have handpicked a few years prior.
it's good that you're giving up rebooting it, because it's definitely not going anywhere. if you keep inviting the same people, the outcome will never change.

Posted by IceFairyAmy
(Unless of course there is actually a purpose to its future existence)

its only purpose was to be a community meant for you. and that's happened because you gradually got banned everywhere else back then. you're fine now, so you can let it go. you can go anywhere, you don't need to run places yourself.

as for you and Discord, I'm not sure what's the whole deal. you seem to make new accounts, only to run away from them afterwards; due to you being friends with certain people you "cause trouble for" or member in some groups where you think people are mad at you.
honestly, I haven't seen anybody mad at you in a long while.
the last group you made is still up and running. it's actually lived for a fair while after you left. we'd be glad to have you back anytime.

I hope you coming back to Kafuka under "a different name" doesn't imply a new account. I agree your real name is best, it's a pretty cute name if you ask me. I feel you'd disagree, though. :P

Posted by IceFairyAmy
I'm definitely not going to MtF because I only jumped on that bandwagon to look cool, like a certain somebody, to be straight with you people.

knowing you, that's probably half true. while you never took the whole deal seriously (never looked up the possible ways for you to transition, etc) but you'd liked to be a girl. also, you somewhat hoped transitionning would solve some of your problems, or at least get you somewhere. it makes sense, despite not being the adequate approach.
at the same time, the whole MtF deal was getting more than common among the people you frequent, and you geniunely related to some of thier dysphoria. so you, at some point, may have assumed you were the same.
I think somewhere you knew this was misdiagnosis, but you kept going because it allowed you to talk to people on another level, and have something in common.

Posted by IceFairyAmy
I'm done with hiding behind a million names and stuff, I just need to be me, and that's that. ME is a better person than these fake identities try to be, since a few months.

that's good. there's just something I'd like to point out: while changing names so much is unusual, it reflects your inner trouble to make a pick and your likeliness to change your mind given time.
it's not wrong of you. it's hard for people to keep up so they complain, but it's not your fault. you need not blame yourself for that.

those many names doesn't make any of your past identities fake. these were all you, they are all you. and we accept you as you are.
you have issues? we all have issues. you argue you have bigger issues? we help you through those issues.


if you geniunely try to work on yourself and get ahead, I don't see why people would complain. either way, the moment you truely attempt to get ahold of yourself and your life, you'll have people backing you up.

side note: have you read my post in your previous thread? I wrote that a while ago, but it goes hand-in-hand with this post.

Jamie
Posted on 05-11-18 08:51 PM Link | ID: 132160


Level: 63


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Since: 06-03-14
From: East Kent, UK

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I did read your post.
I just chose not to respond at the time.

Also, I have my phone back, and I’d like my name changed to Jamie (with the real handle thing also set to that), but probably won’t be really here anymore as I promised my dad I wouldn’t get myself involved with much of the toxic lot. Though most of said toxic lot aren’t here they might arrive once they find me here, so it’s best I stay away most of the time and only come on here sometimes. ^^

ゼンガー・ゾンボルト
Posted on 05-11-18 09:06 PM (rev. 2 of 05-11-18 09:48 PM by ゼンガー・ゾンボルト) Link | ID: 132166

Fire Snake
My name is Sanger Zonvolt. I am the Sword that cleaves evil!
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Posted by IceFairyAmy

Also, I have my phone back, and I’d like my name changed to Jamie (with the real handle thing also set to that), but probably won’t be really here anymore as I promised my dad I wouldn’t get myself involved with much of the toxic lot. Though most of said toxic lot aren’t here they might arrive once they find me here, so it’s best I stay away most of the time and only come on here sometimes. ^^


That'd be IF they find you here. Also, why would anyone waste time following a single person to some obscure forum only to throw shit around?

Don't take this the wrong way. This is in no way some sort of insult to you.

____________________
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My youtube channel
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Jamie
Posted on 05-11-18 10:02 PM Link | ID: 132167


Level: 63


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Since: 06-03-14
From: East Kent, UK

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Most of the “toxic lot” I’m talking about are 13-15 year olds who hang around AcmlmBoards

Literally in my stupid server there were like 2 decent people in it other than Thierry and fiver and they were Sherry (who is completely unreachable outside Discord) and Yushe (I have her phone number). And several others were just stalking idiots without right life - me included in a sense since I kinda stalked a few people

ゼンガー・ゾンボルト
Posted on 05-11-18 10:11 PM (rev. 2 of 05-11-18 10:12 PM by ゼンガー・ゾンボルト) Link | ID: 132168

Fire Snake
My name is Sanger Zonvolt. I am the Sword that cleaves evil!
Level: 128


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Since: 01-04-12
From: Sweden

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Posted by IceFairyAmy
Yushe


Hmm. Has she been a member on former Acmlmboards? That username looks familiar.

Edit: Looks like she's registered. No wonder I recognized it then.

____________________
There is nothing that can stand against my Zankantou!

My youtube channel
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Epele
Posted on 05-12-18 01:26 AM Link | ID: 132179
Administrator
The Sorceress.
Warning: Explicit Content.

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Since: 01-01-12
From: UK

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Don't worry about toxic people following you here. If they truly are toxic, we'd not want them here - and ban them.


<Nicolyn> Thierry doesn't sleep
<Nicolyn> she is powered solely by those little floating hearts

Thieppy
Posted on 05-12-18 03:45 AM Link | ID: 132182


gee, waffles!
Level: 91


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Since: 03-19-13
From:

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said toxic people have a limited set of action they can do about you here, even regardless of staff.
this board is "safe". if they do anything remotely bad they're outta here anyway.

as for the last Discord server you made, it's decent. I've been moderator there for long enough and there haven't been outbreaks like on your previous ones, the peeps there are calm enough.
the only ban I had to apply was Moonlight, who went ranting about your parents being bad for too long. so he's out of the picture.

on a unrelated note, I may give up on mailing you the Touhou plushies considering your parents will probably(?) refuse the package if we don't ask beforehand. I'd rather hand you the Flan/Cirno plushies in person since I'm planning to go to UK sometime, the only problem is when.

my reason to go: "meet bunbuns uninvited like the best girl I am~"

on one hand I'd like go to visit Epele once I'm more confident and I can actually speak English. I'm working on it but it's slow. and of course, by then I'd like to look however I wish I looked like.
on the other hand, I've been meaning to meet Jamie for a couple years now. but I can't deny the major reason I want to hurry the meeting is to hand them the plushies. poor plushies sealed in a box. (;°^°;)

Jamie
Posted on 05-12-18 11:11 AM Link | ID: 132184


Level: 63


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Since: 06-03-14
From: East Kent, UK

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Just keep the plushies for now

Maybe once I get a credit/debit card you can mail me the stuff and I can say I bought them from somewhere internationally... ^^

Toxic people don’t really care about this place nor would they be able to do anything. This is probably the only acmlmboard I actually like now: I’m neutral about K64.

Moonlight Capital
Posted on 05-15-18 04:52 PM Link | ID: 132405
Click here for catgirls
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Since: 04-26-16
From: Italy

Last post: 7 days
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What to say, um...



He cannot learn from his mistakes...

Notice: I didn't leak any IP address, that is just a placeholder

NightYoshi370
Posted on 05-16-18 03:33 AM Link | ID: 132421


Level: 26


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"He cannot learn from his mistakes"

How is it his fault? According to the post he made earlier and the screenshot above, he claims that his father is the cause

(Also, he already posted it here. I'll quote the text below)

Posted by Jamie
And now I'm leaving the Internet, yet again.

This time for real, because my parents destroyed both my phones in my face (took them off me and then proceeded to smash them down on the floor in the road).

I'm not returning until I've MtF'd and moved to Brooklyn NY, but I don't think I will be able to do either of those things before everyone's moved on.

Goodbye :(



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fiver
Posted on 05-17-18 12:46 AM Link | ID: 132467

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Posted by Jamie
Discord is also a no-go since I've caused problems and others have caused me problems there, more the former though.


Well fuck.

NightYoshi370
Posted on 05-23-18 12:35 AM Link | ID: 132751


Level: 26


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Welp, jamie told someone to post this here but I guess he forgot to? So I'll do it. Normally I don't want to be involved with this stuff, but since he didn't, I guess I will.


Hi, I want to leave a message. Please pass it on if you can, MoonlightCapital, to Kafuka and some other places if needed.

I probably, and this is a 99% chance rather than a 100%, that I won't be returning to any forums I was previously at or anything like that, because of one simple reason - I am literally addicted to people on the Internet, and that's explain my downfall over the past two years and reason for people hating me other than my general immaturity which was more prevalent in 2014-2015, though 2016+ resulting in weirdness and erratic behaviour from me over the past 3 years has made me decide that I have literally no need to come back.

Unfortunately, I literally have a complete inability to properly handle the Internet and the people on it. It's clear because I got hated by my own people, and my general erratic behaviour over the past years with things like my absolutely terrible community management - said community was only relevant when I was still banned from every board in existence anyway, and even then it probably should have ceased at 101G I3 back in September - and to be honest I can't be bothered talking to people online as it causes me to be addicted again.

I know for a fact I won't change for quite a long time. In fact, I only really seem to change how I am every few years, given I barely changed between early 2014-late 2015, and then drastically (and in some ways for the worse) changed from 2016 onwards but never really had any differences between 2016 and 2018 besides even worse behaviour online (mostly repeated mistakes that I never properly learnt from).

I'm not even that much of a good person in the first place. Take what happened with Avery, Index, and a few others for example, I lost them due to my idiocy and general stupid actions. They were decent people, and didn't deserve to hang around with me then, or now, I decided to be an idiot and try to get a relationship with them... and it didn't work out.

I'd rather just leave it here at this point. There's literally no incentive to return, and even if I do get my phone back one day again (quite possibly in September), I will not be hanging around the communities or talking to anyone online in any way. It just leads to problems and issues on both ends... also, if anyone decides to try to find me anywhere, and I recognise you, I will literally just block you because I don't want to have any communication with any of you again.

See you never Jamie


Source: https://moonlightcapital.ml/thread/14/#post83

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Decoy Blimp
Posted on 05-25-18 01:44 AM (rev. 2 of 05-25-18 01:45 AM by Decoy Blimp) Link | ID: 132792
What is real will prosper
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Since: 06-26-17
From: Byfield, MA

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Given how many times Jamie has left and come back, I doubt this is permanent.

Jamie, if you're reading this, I used to be going through a similar thing you went through on a board similar to this one and I caused a lot of unnecessary drama. What ended up causing me to stop being so addicted to going to boards like this was moving across the US and going to a new school where I was much busier than I was previously and where I made supportive friends. I'm not saying you have to move and start life over, but I think your problem stems from too much free time to worry about stuff like this. That was the case for me.

What I'd recommend you do is try to start being more active in real life. Given things you've said in previous situations like this, it definitely seems like you're dealing with depression, anxiety, or a combo of both. Find a local support group for people with depression in town and join it. Not only will you be occupying yourself in the real world, but you'll meet friends along the way who will be there to support you and in turn improve your confidence.

I know it doesn't seem like anything will be better and you'll be stuck long into the foreseeable future, but take it from a guy who wanted to put a bullet in his head, things will change. I know every natural instinct you have tells you to reject what I'm saying, but it's true.

Best of luck. Feel free to PM me or add me on Discord if you use it (My tag is Decoy Blimp#4468)

Moonlight Capital
Posted on 05-25-18 07:48 AM Link | ID: 132800
Click here for catgirls
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He doesn't use Discord because he's too stubborn thinking it only causes trouble.

Decoy Blimp
Posted on 05-25-18 04:13 PM Link | ID: 132817
What is real will prosper
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Since: 06-26-17
From: Byfield, MA

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Last view: 1 day
That's unfortunate. I feel bad for Jamie, I hope things get better for him.

Jamie
Posted on 06-09-18 04:02 PM Link | ID: 133585


Level: 63


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Since: 06-03-14
From: East Kent, UK

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I'll probably be arond again once I feel happy and sensible enough. I'm maybe close to getting a girlfriend so that's good ^^

Thieppy
Posted on 06-09-18 04:06 PM Link | ID: 133589


gee, waffles!
Level: 91


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Since: 03-19-13
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oh hey, at least you're around for a bit. I've been meaning to look for you.

you needn't restrict yourself to black and white notions like "be gone" or "be around once whatever is accomplished", we were always fine with how you are. my advice is just go at your own pace.

fiver
Posted on 06-11-18 11:38 PM Link | ID: 133692

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Posted by Thieppy
we were always fine with how you are.

we what >_>

Thieppy
Posted on 06-12-18 04:04 PM Link | ID: 133757


gee, waffles!
Level: 91


Posts: 2617/3013
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Since: 03-19-13
From:

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we as in, people here never ever had a problem with Jamie. all that's ever happened was outsite Kafuka.
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