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03-28-24 01:49 PM
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Main - The Officer's Club - Your dreams vs. Reality
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Posted on 03-11-15 09:14 PM Link | ID: 82902
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Koopa

Level: 24


Posts: 11/112
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Since: 02-11-15
From: Bowling Green, KY

Last post: 3249 days
Last view: 3206 days
As it stands, I am a man who is heavily in debt. I was convinced by my mother to take out loans. I was 18... I am now 22. I will be 23 in November.

And I'm facing a terrible mental crisis. There is the part of me that realizes I should be working nonstop, like 55+ hours a week to pay for all of my bills, buy food, take care of myself.

But the side of me that is taking over, and wants to say screw the more secure lifestyle, is investing a large sum of money into equipment. Electronics. Because I only want to do YouTube stuff. Editing is literally an addiction for me, and I realize that all of my internet comes from gaming personalities. So...

The other day, I snapped. The second side won over. I had car troubles, ice and snow were everywhere, and I had my scheduled changed on me without my knowledge. I was six hours late before they called me to let me know. I walked outside, pissed, slipped on a large collection of ice, and bashed my head. I laid there for about ten minutes in pain before I called in... and quit my job.

Then I decided to take on another job, (bottom of the barrel job) and then I just... work two-three days a week, free lance editing every other days. I'm living on the bare minimum. Super minimum. But I'm so much happier.

I'm not sure if I'm being delusional, and I don't even want to make a ton of money on YouTube or anything... I just want to be a large part of that community. And I'm happy that I'm doing that.

Am I being delusional about what I want?

KP
Posted on 03-12-15 04:24 PM Link | ID: 82910
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NES Game Aficionado
Level: 73


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Since: 01-02-12

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I'm a few thousand in debt as well. Not over 10k, but it's a debt and it does hang over me. I do pay my own bills though, and am able to make decent payments. So it doesn't weigh so heavy on me so as to eat away at my determination to maintain those payments. But once you get to the point where you're making the smallest payments as defined by your contract, your interest is often the greatest inhibitor in getting those debts paid off.

I see your point... getting yourself to stay focused on maintaining the lifestyle required to reliably continue to make payments can be really monotonous and tiring, to the point where you are just burnt out on dwelling on your situation. The desire to just give up is there, usually right in front of you. All while this is going on, other elements of your life seem to be plotting your demise.

You have to do things to mitigate this, somehow. I'm always electronics hungry. I'm always taking part in some online activity, or engaged in some form of creativity. I have a killer PC setup, and I might have been out of debt had I not bought all this stuff. But, on the other hand, would I be mentally capable of handling life without a means to be comfortable?

It's not bad to make yourself comfortable. It's healthy to maintain a certain level of comfort and happiness. Therefore, justifying having nice things is reasonable, to a point. Compulsive buying, uneducated financial decisions, and having eyes larger than your wallet are all things I've had to learn (the hard way) how to mitigate. Get comfortable, but not too comfortable.

Mitigate your income. Assuming you don't have a budget, open up an excel spreadsheet and make yourself a little calendar for the year and each day a bill is due, write it in for that day. Write in your paydays, too. Then, in your spreadsheet, make a list of your monthly income and outgoing funds, and make a list of your debt balances. Then, start with the top row with how much money you actually have (balance), then work your way down each row with each income/outgoing event, adjusting your balance as you go, noting the description and a date. Before I had a balance, this hung over my head bigtime. Now that I can see what all I owe and how my cash flow works, I can finally see light at the end of a tunnel (and it's not a train) and my worries were drastically reduced.

It might be a bit intimidating to see the total of all your debts, but it's the enlightenment you want. That final debt number should be encouraging you to get out of debt as fast as you possibly can, and that number will stay with you when deciding to go out and buy more things. It'll cause you to think about your money more carefully, and will play a part as you go through your justifications for wanting something nice. The compulsive buying will be reduced, and your financial decisions will be greatly more educated.

Your passions in what you want to do with your free time and, ultimately, what you want to do in life are also important. But it's also wise to recognize that you can spend too much time doing that as well.

There's nothing delusional about "what you want". You just need to mitigate and educate yourself in getting there. Quitting your job might have been a good call for you, especially since you got another job already. Keep that momentum going.

You'll be alright.



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Posted on 03-22-15 06:24 PM Link | ID: 83154
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Koopa

Level: 24


Posts: 18/112
EXP: 68428
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Since: 02-11-15
From: Bowling Green, KY

Last post: 3249 days
Last view: 3206 days
Much appreciated with the reply. I had quickly become discouraged with life when it felt like every step that I took moving forward, someone pushed me back. I've reevaluated my finances and after my taxes returned, I pumped it all into rent. I'm still working 25-30 hours a week, continuing to push rent as far away from now as possible.

You see, I'm a part of a trio who really wants to make this work. I'm the video editor (anything production) and it takes a long time even to do five or ten minute videos. I've bought everything I need, and now I'm putting back money for art, and all this sort of thing, but... man. It is stressful to budget for advertising (or knowing the best place to go for YouTube related ads), editing everyone's videos (All on Monday, Me on Tuesday, Friend 1 on Wednesday, Friend 2 on Thursday, Amiibo Arena match on Friday, higher production video every fourth Saturday), as well as paying artists for certain things.

It's stressful, but I'm managing. I guess I'm not used to being forced to be a leader, but man... it's stressful. My brain hurts. It's why I posted here.

For some kinda therapeutic resolution for myself, an extra leg.

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