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ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 141/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Board death? Is there no way to shock paddle life back into it?
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ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 142/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Well I'm gonna count this as dead by now, ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 143/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
You guys would know better than me tbh i don't understand (and I'm not sure if I want) popularity |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 144/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Well like I said I don't really have any concept of how to make things popular over here (I assume it's wizards and voodoo) and I have a concept of how boring I actual am so I tend to try and not subject people to it ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 145/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Echo, My dang username is pronounced echo.
NOT eco NOT etcho NOT E.K.Zero NOT E.K.O (Outta nowhere) NOT Eck Zero NOT E.K Underscore Zero NOT E.K. Underscore Oh 4 Characters in my username and the amount of people that get it wrong is absurd. :/ |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 146/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
So err... I have posted here once and.. You guys... are brilliant hugs all round. I kinda want a little bit of help with... things. (More on that in a minute.)
But yeah so anyone who knows me IRL (Sapphire) would know that I am single and have been for pretty much my whole life. [The last time a girl had an interest in me asked me out and I thought it was a joke], however there may be a thing with another girl that liked me which may have made a guy hate me but there is not enough information to have anything done about that so disregard the second example. But yeah recently I thought I'd do something about the whole "Single" thing and that ended up with 6-7 (I stopped counting) failed attempts which on it's own isn't good for my self esteem but then a girl who I have genuinely been in love with. Yes LOVE the word that I have hated for years is the word I would use for the feelings I had for her... This is something I kept quite about as she had a few boyfriends while I liked her and she was aware I liked her and was aware I was jealous and she said she LOVED me... For context she was the only and first girl to say she loved me and to this day still is. So I'm gonna have strong feelings for her just from that but then factor in my ability to get really attached to people that show affection back to me, and factor in that I think my autism went into play I think so either add that in or not... Either way shortly after she said she loved me she told me she didn't anymore, (Now at this point if I did that to HER I would've been goddamn crucified for it), and got with a guy who sent nude pics of her round my old school. {Now before you say that I should've backed out at this point remember I'm an idiot and love is blind okay}. Now I don't know about the rest of you but love isn't a fucking light switch that can just be flicked on and off so obviously I was still pretty in love with her but I decided to just be a nice guy and if it happened it happened... So months of hearing her complain to me about how her boyfriend doesn't love her and she never finds a right guy and me sitting there like damn it must be horrible to feel like that huh, too bad I wouldn't know [Sarcasm]. But she was aware I liked her still so she must've understood what she was putting me through... (Exactly what she was "going through"). This involved me supporting her for an hour or so while I was at eurogamer because her boyfriend broke up with her for crying out loud and I was only there for like 6 hours which also wasted an hour of one of my friends time too. But yeah from mid 2014 (When it started) lets fast forward to new years eve shall we? It ticks over to midnight and I decide to man the F up and get a straight answer out. (Until then she had been giving me maybes and I don't know what the future holds for us whenever I tried to get a straight answer.) And she just rips my heart out... again... and just decides that she didn't have time for this and wants to get it over with because she was having a bad day. So I kinda spent the first 30 mins of 2015 in tears, but after i pulled myself together I started to get over her... And just earlier today I found out that ANOTHER guy (Her-ex) HATES me because I was apparently hitting on her! (Supporting her while they were going through problems in their relationship) And that was the last straw for me... So I messaged her that I was pissed that this guy hated me and her response was "Lol Ok" so I gave her the whole I'm done I don't want to be hated for supporting a friend thing to which her response was "I'll go then" Like she was FINALLY getting rid off me... Either way this ended up with me punching a wall... And it hurt... Not because I loved her... Not because I felt like an ass.. Because another human being... with sentient thoughts... rational decision making... and feelings... decided that they didn't want someone who would actually care about them in their life... But I have managed to move on and one of my friends decided to try and set me up with a girl who decided that she didn't want me and wanted some other guy again and now I question everything about me... Now this part may offend some girls who read this but please keep in mind that these are just observations I made that I am writing down. I don't think girls want what they say that want and preach about in indirect statuses because if it was true then by logic I would have more girls that wanted to be with me and guys like my friends who are also single. It seems like girls WANT guys who will hurt them (Doesn't apply to all sort of a majority) and I don't know why but it seems ... like if I want to be in a relationship I will need to start acting like a dick to girls I like and it will work? I don't know and please nobody hate me for saying that but that's what I have observed and remembered and has plagued my thoughts for so long... I'm just feeling... Violent now... like I'm gonna snap... and I'm scared that when I do... someone is gonna get seriously hurt and I don't wanna hurt people. Okay I'm gonna leave this here before this becomes a small book, Thanks if you made it this far and I just kinda want any response from this like support, questions, statements, opinions anything... Thank you... really thank you... |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 147/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
I'm just saying from what I've heard I'd think that girls would have wanted a guy that would do anything for them, that would stand by them. blah blah blah etc etc etc you get the idea. basically what I wanted to be was exactly what they told me they wanted... And as far as I can tell... It's wrong...
Well either way it's just weird that my being nice to people gets me pushed to the side and hated and I watch as other guys are just dicks to people and all I hear is how great they are. How much people think they are awesome. How much they want to be with them... I'm gonna be honest when I talk to people I feel like I am just wasting there time... That could be me reading people wrong but then again I would have no idea. Oh and like 90% of the people I talk to are girls and 100% are either not interested in me/In a relationship/In another continent. So nothing really works... I guess the specific scenario I posted hit me harder though because it was the first time anyone has EVER told me that... And you gotta admit... It seems like a hell to go through for a first love... Some people have cute stories about that sort of stuff... Now I have a story how my heart got ripped out... twice... and that will never change I can't forget this and I don't know what's worse... That I won't forget... or that SHE will... She has "loved" before so I meant practically nothing to her looking back on it and now all that will happen is that I will just fade away in her memory... While I am tortured to have these moments scarred into my mind. First love isn't forgotten... |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 148/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
I got that I'm not saying that I haven't moved on and that I'm hurting, it's more I'm a little sleepy and have a long train journey back to were I started if that makes sense.
UPDATE: Everything has been sorted out after a massive argument that involved 2 people yelling at me and one person actually talking to me. |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 149/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Posted by KawaPosted by ek_0It's pronounced /ˈɛkəʊ/ then? Ecco, as they wrote in Middle English? To be fair, it does literally say "ek_0". To be fair I over estimated the intelligence of most gamers when I set it as my username too, I still had similar problems like this when my username was Echo131 people still pronounced it eco and etcho either way i just cover all the bases and I assumed that people would sort of sound it out but then again I was expecting gamers to give a shit about things nowadays which rarely happens. |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 150/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
WARNING:
Product may be; Unstable, Quiet, Loud, Clumsy, Sideways, Stupid (And we're talking like really stupid, seriously just take our word for it. Like square peg, round hole stupid), Direct, Indirect, Shy, Unnecessarily depressed, Unnecessarily happy, Obsessive, Adorable, Awkward, Intolerable, Arrogant, Generous, Clingy, Clueless, and Lazy. Product may cause; Frustration, Impatience, Anger, Aloofness, Confusion, Laughter, Explosions, Procrastination. Keep away from; Awkward Situations, Awkward Social Situations, Relationships or feelings of strong affection to members of the opposite gender, Violence, Large Quantities of work, Small quantities of work, Work. Thank you for purchasing and good luck ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 151/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
No but by logic this is something I (Devon Williams, awkward English 16 year old) have created and have used therefore it is not a place where people will want to be, use, or even acknowledge ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 152/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Can I has hugs? ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 153/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Her? Who is she and why are we holding activity on her? |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 154/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
well I thought it looked cool...
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ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 155/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
*crudely scrawls at the bottom of not in blue crayon*
"If any of above problems occur apply hugs until resolved" ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 156/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Pretty much |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 157/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
[SITUATION RESOLVED END OF THREAD BUT READ ON IF YOU WISH]
Okay so things are cool with this, I've moved on, things are looking up and it turns out the girl is manipulating people at my old school so yeah there is no hope for her, and about me worried about people hating me. I remembered I'm 6'5" relatively strong and don't give a fuck anymore about the random people who hate me ![]() But on a serious note thanks for helping me out on here you guys, specifically Saph, KP and Nicole ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 158/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Hey Squiddy it's me Devon (Ek_0) you know the one with the identity crisis as you pointed out in the AMA ![]() Now I want you to listen to me I don't see what you're doing as attention whoring, I understand that things have gone to shit for you and you don't see things getting better, If I may presume you feel like you are in a dark place, well let me tell you that this is okay to feel like this and it will make the light in your future seem that much brighter. Now I have not spoke to you that much honestly but you were one of the many people on this forum that I wanted to know more about and converse with. I care, I have never met you, I don't know anything about you and we don't speak much but I care about you. I care because you helped me way back when i was "Paranoid" and I want to help you get through this just like most people here will want to help. So I want to offer you my full support just PM me and let me know if you want me to help and I will give you whatever means of contacting me you want. A lot of people are here for you Squiddy, A lot of people care. |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 159/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Hey I'm gonna throw my 2 cents in again and say, I want to be here for you with what you're going through because honestly I really have been worried about you since I posted in this thread, (Because that's when I found out about all this) And honestly you were one of the people I've always thought was so cool here and genuinely wanted to talk to more...
Look all I'm trying to say is I think you're awesome and I want to help/support/both of the previous, you until you are feeling better and then keep helping you beyond that ![]() |
ek_0 |
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Normal User
![]() Purple Leever Level: 32 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 160/213 EXP: 191887 Next: 14555 Since: 11-02-14 From: Earth Last post: 3515 days Last view: 3441 days |
Hey has anyone got a response from Squiddy because honestly I'm worried and it would make me a little less uneasy if I knew she contacted someone... |
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