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12-03-24 05:23 PM

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Main - The Officer's Club - About to Break

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Next Jen

Posted on 12-15-12 04:14 AM, in

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Roughly two weeks ago my husband lost his job. He and others were let go. Since then, he's been looking for a job but hasn't had any luck yet, just a lot of maybes. Thankfully, we have people helping us in the search. I announced on Twitter the situation and had a few people suggest a few places. We're even considering moving to Texas if he can get a job there and the money is worth it.

We're okay right now for money. It is next month that will be the problem, especially with rent. Our lease is up at the end of January, so if we do choose to move out, we won't get hit with any penalties. Thing is, we cannot afford to move into a new/cheaper apartment because they require pet deposits, first/last month rent and other fees. If we do move out, it will be into his parents' house. This is something that I do not want to do. We have a dog and two cats. His father is allergic to cats, however I'm allergic to both cats and dogs yet I own them. Anyway, we can move in, but the cats cannot come with. I am not okay with this. My husband suggested having my dad watch the cats until we're back on our own. Thing is, he is two hours away and has his own problems. Plus he's the "crazy cat lady" type. He rescues and feeds strays, which means he has a lot of cats, but he doesn't have a lot of money. I know his heart is in the right place, but if he can't afford it, then maybe he should stop. He's already told me that he's cut back on money spent on cat food.

So, not sure what will happen next month if my husband doesn't get a new job. I hate my job, but I'm stuck there and at least I have a job. My brother-in-law has a friend that has self published a book and I've been e-mailing him for tips. I've been thinking about self publishing my first book and hope for the best (I'm in the middle of the second book). Not sure how money extra cash that would bring since it will be word of mouth at first via social network, family and friends. But I need to try and it might be better in the long run instead of looking and waiting for a publisher.

Anyhoo--I feel like I'm about to break. I'm going insane. Not sure what is going to happen and I'm pretty freaking scared to boot.

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Posted on 12-15-12 04:22 AM, in

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Wish I knew what to say right now other than...ouch. That sucks, big time.

Was just about to go to bed when I saw this. I'll read it again tomorrow evening. Try not to panic, at least. That'll never do any good.

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Posted on 12-15-12 04:53 AM, in

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I'm sorry to hear this. I know that won't help, but I truly hope that things change soon. I know job hunting is Hell, but I'm sure that soon something good will turn up! You still have a month, and there's always a chance. So don't give up hope

As for your nerves, if you feel you're gonna break, we're always here. Come and take a load off, do something fun that you love. Like writing, that always helps. If you're feeling like you're gonna break, I'm sure anyone on the IRC will be more than willing to listen and help cheer you up. I know you don't much care for IRC, but hey, I might as well offer it.

But whatever, I hope everything turns out for the best.

Taryn

Posted on 12-15-12 05:23 AM, in (rev. 2 of 12-15-12 05:23 AM by

Taryn)

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Aww.......*hugs Anya*

This economy is a bitch. I've never had much luck with jobs and schools and such myself, I'm never in the top 0.0001% that every employer these days insists on. Bleh. It's not your fault Anya, it's all the Boomers in Congress who think it's still the 1950s when the jobs hadn't yet moved to China, and they call Gen Y "lazy" when they're the ones who ruined it for us with the outsourcing and shit.

But I digress.

Sucks about that and about your kitties. I know you'll miss them. Snuggle the stuffed one I got you if that helps ^_^

I know it'll be hard though. Kitties are so wonderful.

I'm here for you, I'll always be your friend. You haven't lost everything, at least you still have your own job. Even if it sucks, it's money. And I'll buy your book if you get it published (self or otherwise).

____________________
'Cause when you've given up,
When no matter what you do it's never good enough,
When you never thought that it could ever get this tough,
That's when you feel my kind of love.

MIGHTY-BLACKDRAGON-

Posted on 12-15-12 02:54 PM, in

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Posted by Anya
Roughly two weeks ago my husband lost his job. He and others were let go. Since then, he's been looking for a job but hasn't had any luck yet, just a lot of maybes. Thankfully, we have people helping us in the search. I announced on Twitter the situation and had a few people suggest a few places. We're even considering moving to Texas if he can get a job there and the money is worth it.

We're okay right now for money. It is next month that will be the problem, especially with rent. Our lease is up at the end of January, so if we do choose to move out, we won't get hit with any penalties. Thing is, we cannot afford to move into a new/cheaper apartment because they require pet deposits, first/last month rent and other fees.

Let me ask you a few things before I give you an answer...
Whats more important to you the Cat/DOG or having a roof over your head ?
Are you willing to sacrafice some stuff to keep your marriage strong or do you like conflicts because of obstacles in your way ?

Next Jen

Posted on 12-15-12 04:03 PM, in

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I'm not one of those people who adopt a pet and then when a situation comes up, leaves them behind. For one, older cats to do get adopted if I do opt to leave them at a shelter. They get put to sleep, sorry, but I am not going to do that. As I said, I am allergic to cats and dogs but I live with them. There are medicines that my father-in-law can take to help with his allergy. And if we do choose to live with them, they we can keep the cats on the opposite end of the house.

I don't know if you meant that the cats are "stuff" since they do not fit that word, I will assume not. As far as stuff, I don't have a lot of it and it is not worth much regardless. I don't go out, I spend my time at home, playing video games and on the net. When I do go out, it is usually for work only. I grew up poor, I'm used to it and I know how to eat/act when the situation comes up. Plus I work with food, I can just eat at work.

Since our lease is up soon, I suggested moving into a smaller apartment, but my husband did the math and it would on'y save us roughly two hundred dollars or so. I wouldn't mind, but he doesn't think the space is worth it. And with a garage, it comes out to almost the same price as we are paying now. I'm up for loosing the garage and I really should bring this up again to him, but I think he mentioned that there are none available for when our lease is up.

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MIGHTY-BLACKDRAGON-

Posted on 12-15-12 05:44 PM, in (rev. 2 of 12-15-12 05:47 PM by MIGHTY-BLACKDRAGON-)

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Posted by Anya

Since our lease is up soon, I suggested moving into a smaller apartment, but my husband did the math and it would on'y save us roughly two hundred dollars or so. I wouldn't mind, but he doesn't think the space is worth it. And with a garage, it comes out to almost the same price as we are paying now. I'm up for loosing the garage and I really should bring this up again to him, but I think he mentioned that there are none available for when our lease is up.

Here is part of your answer, keep the cats go live with your parents for abit.
Save up enough money to buy a small house or condo.
I don't know where you live in FLA but there are some decent places to live.

You may not like this idea but I think its best, least you can keep an eye on your parents/pet, you have roof over your head and like you said a hot meal.
If need be sell some out stuff out the garage to have a lil bit of money for emergency.

Last thing I recommend you do is pray and seek some guidance.

Thats just my thoughts on your suitation.

Next Jen

Posted on 12-15-12 06:14 PM, in

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I can't live with my parents. My mom lives in PR and my dad lives two hours away and doesn't have the space. The option is to live with the in laws.

Can't get a house or condo, been trying to, everything is too expensive.

We called again about moving into a small apartment, but the complex won't know if one is available until the end of December, so we should know more by then.

Hot meal isn't an issue. As I said, I work with food, I can eat at work.

The stuff in the garage are old clothes, stuffed animals, old books, my bicycle that I use to get to work and some old records (which we did sell those that had some value). Nothing in that garage would get me more than ten bucks. The clothes I've been meaning to donate anyway.

And praying and seeking guidance isn't going to get my husband a job or more money in our bank account. Hard work will. Which is why I've been stepping up to finish my second book, at least then I will have two books finished instead of one.

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Posted on 12-15-12 06:54 PM, in

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Posted by Anya
I can't live with my parents. My mom lives in PR and my dad lives two hours away and doesn't have the space. The option is to live with the in laws.

Can't get a house or condo, been trying to, everything is too expensive.

We called again about moving into a small apartment, but the complex won't know if one is available until the end of December, so we should know more by then.

Hot meal isn't an issue. As I said, I work with food, I can eat at work.

The stuff in the garage are old clothes, stuffed animals, old books, my bicycle that I use to get to work and some old records (which we did sell those that had some value). Nothing in that garage would get me more than ten bucks. The clothes I've been meaning to donate anyway.

And praying and seeking guidance isn't going to get my husband a job or more money in our bank account. Hard work will. Which is why I've been stepping up to finish my second book, at least then I will have two books finished instead of one.

Your a complicated woman you know that ?
Yet you are head strong and determined to see your way through this.
You don't believe prayer or seeking guidance isn't the answer but in more ways you are wrong. -_-

Keep us informed and remember what I said, not trying to make it harder for you but giving you some ideas to think about. :/

Good Luck Anya.

Taryn

Posted on 12-15-12 08:34 PM, in

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Praying does nothing. It might make you feel better but it isn't going to magically give you what you need.

Looks like you can publish a book for free through here. I've never done it though, so I don't know the details ^_~

____________________
'Cause when you've given up,
When no matter what you do it's never good enough,
When you never thought that it could ever get this tough,
That's when you feel my kind of love.

Marzen64

Posted on 12-15-12 09:05 PM, in

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I... think we should take the subject in here off of prayer. That's a topic for another Officer's Club thread. Debating it in here won't make Anya feel any better, will it?

Next Jen

Posted on 12-15-12 09:49 PM, in

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Thanks Taryn, I'll bookmark it.

My brother-in-law's friend gave me three links to check out, which has really motivated me.

One of the things that worries me, is that I don't feel much anymore. Like I'm more numb than usual. I'm worried, yes, but I feel numb to it, if that makes any sense.

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Scrydan

Posted on 12-25-12 08:08 PM, in

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I'm sorry to hear all that you've been through for the last two or so weeks and about not replying sooner. I wanted to post something detailed and so much time passed that I have totally forgotten most of what I had planned to mention. Sometimes I feel I don't say all I'd like to.

I hope you get some good news soon and have a merry Christmas!

Emuz

Posted on 01-04-13 06:57 PM, in

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Sorry I didn't respond to this sooner. I've just had a lot going on. Has things improved @Anya?

I'm going to take it that your apt is a 1 year min lease? Hopefully the job market will be better soon.

Any more news since the new year? \

Posted by Anya
I've been thinking about self publishing my first book and hope for the best (I'm in the middle of the second book). Not sure how money extra cash that would bring since it will be word of mouth at first via social network, family and friends. But I need to try and it might be better in the long run instead of looking and waiting for a publisher.

My mother published three books using self publishing back in the mid 90's. I think you would have a few advantages that she didn't have. You've got a good base of friends, an active Twitter following, you've been published in a game site, as well as the communities you participate in (here, Jul, etc). With self publishing it's about getting the word out. (And getting published is a cool feeling!)

Posted by Anya
Anyhoo--I feel like I'm about to break. I'm going insane. Not sure what is going to happen and I'm pretty freaking scared to boot.

My suggestion is really to relax as much as possible so you can think. Take it day by day and explore every option you get a chance at. I don't know much about your husband but he should look for not only stuff in his field, but what I call "skill adjacent" jobs (Jobs that have elements of what you used to do. ) so you have increase the available jobs. Even if you don't find a perfect fit you can get something else later on your own time.

Overall.. don't panic! No matter how bad a situation is, just add panic and it's becomes all that much harder.

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Next Jen

Posted on 01-18-13 09:11 AM, in

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Thanks guys.

Forgot to update here, but about a week ago, my husband got a new job, so that is a huge plus. He had training this week and he starts up officially this Monday.

I also filed for a copyright for my first book, so waiting on an approval for that.

I still hate my job, but hopefully this book thing will help me get away from it.

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Emuz

Posted on 01-19-13 02:41 AM, in

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Well I am happy that everything worked out. I'm glad to see your book is coming along very nicely as well.

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'Victory Noriko' by @thatsheepagain.

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by @thatsheepagain

Noriko Emotes by @Haru__Kitsu.

Side Bar Noriko by @thatsheepagain

'Noriko's Nature Walk' by @projectTiGER_

Emotive Noriko by @thatsheepagain.

"Space Candy Noriko" by BerryVerrine.

"Super Sharp Noriko" by Xionfes.

A gift illustration from the wonderful EverKinzPony!

"Magical Girl Noriko" by @cute_hospital!

"Patient Chibi Noriko" by @Ruii_ki!

'Dapper '60s Noriko' by @thatsheepagain.

'Shiny Chibi Noriko' by @inioli.

'Flower Veil Noriko' by @Sushiee_.

'Noriko in Realism' by @_Sarybuu.

'Noriko's Midnight Adventure' by @projectTiGER_

'Yukata Noriko' by @yunyunmaru_

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